198746

Joke of the Day

"I'm the hier to the Tampax fortune Soon I'll have more blood money than African warlords."

"Rick Astley asked to borrow my Pixar collection. I said ""Rick, you can have Toy Story, Cars & Finding Nemo but I'm never gonna give you Up"""

"A woman recently got oak breast implants... ...this joke would probably be better if it had a punchline, wooden tit."

"I'm an adult, and I can eat whatever I want whenever I want, and I wish someone would take this power from me."

"I've never sky dived but I have zoomed in real fast on google earth"

"Life is like a box of idiots."

"What time does Sean Connery show up to wimbledon? Tennish"

"Sledding with dad ""Dad, I will never ever go sledding with you again!"" ""Shut up and keep pulling, son."""

"I'll never forget my little girl's first words... ""Where are my parents?"""

"The CS:GO Joke. In a COMP match in CSGO how many people does Olofmeister kill? Olofem"