198590

Joke of the Day

"George W. G. Ferris Jr. designed and constructed the first Ferris Wheel. He saw much potential in his new invention, he said, ""This will revolutionise circus attractions!"""

"How did the truck get his girlfriend? Pickup lines"

"Justin Bieber and Ke$ha has sex and gave birth to Rebecca Black."

"GOD: Moses!! I COMMAND YOU TOcan you take your shoes off MOSES: What? Why G: I'm trying to keep the place nice, OK? M: It's a mountain"

"What kind of nuts go on a carrot cake? First time posting to r/baking."

"""I've been waiting for this my whole life"" I thought as the man pointed the gun at my head and demanded I recite ""Bohemian Rhapsody"""

"Sometimes I get take out sushi and eat it at an aquarium just to remind the fish who's boss."

"ME: i need a loan so i can build a robot army to take over the world with BANKER: what M: oops i meant 'with which to take over the world'"

"My uncles wife is a sex therapist. (Possibly NSFW?) I call her Aunty climax."

"Is it official now that Glenn Frey is running on empty? Too soon I know, I'm so sorry! My friend just said this and I couldn't help but laugh."