198435

Joke of the Day

"What's up with these people in Pakistan getting stoned to death? What kind of weed are they growing there?"

"Rosetta Stone is the fastest way to learn how to pronounce the names of Ikea products."

"I bet unscary monsters like to hang out at the back of marathons and imagine all the athletes are running from them."

"When a killer makes you dig your own grave, throw the soil far away so he has trouble backfilling."

"TOO LATE? KNOCK, KNOCK WHO'S THERE? 9/11. 9/11 WHO? WHAT? I THOUGHT WE NEVER FORGOT"

"When my girlfriend complains about how bad her day was I like to hold her hands Because shes deaf"

"What's the best thing about fucking 93 year olds? NOTHING!!!"

"I think lamps are my favorite furniture. They're always brightening up my day."

"Go to a parking lot and put sticky notes on people's cars saying ""sorry for the damage."" Film reactions. Profit."

"What did the photographer say when he retired? ""I can't take it anymore!"""