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Joke of the Day

"Jack and Jill went up the hill; each one had a quarter When they came down Jill had both, You think they went for water?"

"What do you call a twig that won't stop looking in the mirror? A narcissistick."

"My girlfriend asked me to stop singing Wonderwall I said maybeeee..."

"Here's a mind bender my 8 year old son came up with: Why are trees green? For camouflage."

"Romeo: Your cheeks are like petals. Juliet: Really? Romeo: Yes bicycle pedals."

"An aviation enthusiast enters a bar. He asks, ""Do you have any helicopter flavored potato chips?"" The bartender laughs and says, ""Sorry, we only have plain chips."""

"A mathematician stumbles home drunk at 3 a.m. ...and his wife is livid. ""You SWORE that you'd be home by 11:45!"" ""No,"" slurs the mathematician... ""I said I'd be home by a quarter of 12."""

"A man finds a job at an elephant circumcision office. His salary is so low that he wants to quit, but then he sees that the tips are huge!"

"Why can't two Asians make a Caucasian? Because two wongs don't make a white."

"When someone ends a sentence with ""af"" they were hastily trying to type ""A FALCON DESCENDS UPON ME"" but could not make it in time."