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Joke of the Day
"How many Scots didn't turn up to vote? One in Fife"
Next Joke
"Dentist: ok open up ""Well I guess it all started when my dad left..."" Dentist: no I mean- Assistant: wait bill...let him finish"
"I love animals, but I'm thinking of getting rid of my pet anaconda. It keeps taking horse sized dumps. Also, all my horses have gone missing."
"In India, you don't drive on the left of the road.. you drive on what is left on the road."
"Golfer: ""Caddy do you think it is a sin to play golf on Sunday?"" Caddy: ""The way you play sir it's a sin any day of the week!"""
"I met Mrs. Right today Too bad she's already married."
"TIL 6.7 billion people are the minority By arrogant ignorant Americans."
"I drink, therefore I am.... Drunk."
"What do you call an Asian lady sitting on a fence with no arms or legs? Pai-Ling"
"If my wife ends an argument with ""Fine, do what you want!"" I'm pretty sure the words ""If you do, I'll stab you in your sleep"" are implied."