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Joke of the Day

"What did the black cat say to the fish ? I've got a bone to pick with you !"

"What do you call the divorce between Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie? a Brexit"

"What do you get if you cross a frog with a decathlete? Someone who pole-vaults without a pole."

"What would George Washington do if he were alive today? Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin"

"I went to see my Coincidental Hygenist the other day. Turns out she was one of my friends from high school."

"The biggest problem with stupid people is that they don't know they're fcuking stupid."

"The racist chainsaw when you turn it on it will roar out ""RUNNN-niggernigger!"""

"Wife: Did you measure for carpet? Me: Yeah, from the window Wife: Don't Me: To the wall Wife: Don't Me: tothesweatdripoffmyballs! *runs*"

"Recent studies show that eating bacon or other red meats increases your chances of dying by 20% So apparently I have a 120% chance of dying"

"What do you call a man that stabs many packets of Cornflakes? A Cereal Killer."