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Joke of the Day

"Dirty funny What do you get when there are two nuts on a wall? Walnuts. What do you get with two nuts on your chest? Chestnuts. What do you get with two nuts on your chin? A Dick in your mouth."

"What's black and sits at the top of stairs? A paraplegic after a house fire."

"I haven't gone to the washroom in 2 days No shits given"

"A liar, a cheat, and a bigot walked into a bar... ""Let's make America great again!"" he said."

"Scientists have spliced the DNA of a human with a sea cow. Oh, the humanatee."

"After the initial energy surrounding lithium's arrest... Charges were dropped, due to lack of connection."

"will you marry me? ""OMG YES! I love you!!!"" *imagines typing only 4 characters for 'wife' instead of 'girlfriend' on Twitter* I love you too"

"What do you call a hooker who works for spaghetti? A pastatute!"

"What do you call a Star wars fan in an attic? Annakin Frank"

"Whats the worst part about being a news reporter? The shootings"