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Joke of the Day

"Sure, Aphrodite poses naked in a giant clam shell, she's a goddess. But when I do it, I'm ''drunk' and 'no longer welcome at the aquarium'."

"What's the difference between a man and E.T.? E.T. phoned home."

"What did the leper say to the prostitute? keep the tip bitch."

"It's 450 BC. Socrates is doing a keg stand at a philosopher frat party. Gets the nickname SoCRAYtes. Nobody takes him seriously ever again."

"What is the Mexicans favorite credit card company? Capital Juan"

"The older I get, the more I think I owe my parents an apology..."

"""MEN, WE ARE AT WAR WITH THE GREEKS & MUST NOT DROP OUR GUARD AT ALL"" ""Sir, the enemy gave us a giant wooden horse"" ""Oh rad bring it in"""

"Shall I tell you the joke about the kidnappers? I'd better not. You might get carried away."

"Woman: Officer you must help. I've just lost my wig. Police officer: Certainly ma'am we'll comb the area."

"What's crude and beneath most Canadians? America"