196733

Joke of the Day

"Today's joke from Russian-language Internet ""You know, they've built a George Orwell memorial in Russia!"" 'What? Where?"" ""Pretty much everywhere."""

"What do you call a female sex change operation? an addadicktome!"

"What is Hannibal Lecter's favorite Jane Austen quote? **""There is no charm equal to tenderness of heart.""**"

"Girls, get your abortions NOW in case the Republicans win"

"ALIEN:*points at Chihuahua* whats that? ME: a dog ALIEN:*points at Husky* whats that? ME: dog ALIEN:*getting angry, points at Pug* whats THA"

"There's a secret menu item at McDonald's but you can't order it, you can only get it by acting like a jerk. (Cheeseburger wiped on shoe)"

"What's the difference between a blonde and a washing machine? You can throw your load in a washing machine and it won't follow you around for two weeks afterward"

"""One Two Three Four Five Six... KEVIN!!!"" - how I would introduce myself 100% of the time if my parents had blessed me with the name Kevin"

"When I get home to find my wife naked in the tub, seductively asking me to ""warm her up"", I dont waste a second.. to throw in a hairdryer"

"Did you hear about the two gay Irishmen? Michael Fitzpatrick and Patrick Fits Michael"