196140

Joke of the Day

"Me:I think I just saw the main guy from Transformers you know, ol' what's his name Friend: Shia Lebouff Me: Yeah, the one whose a truck"

"The difference between a tea bag and England The tea bag stays longer in the cup."

"1912 called. They want their boring ass concept of a parade back."

"Yeah, I am one of those people who've had milk with whiskey. My mother used to drink a lot post pregnancy."

"Why was Crassus bad at insults? He never really got the hang of Parthian shots."

"Why shouldn't white people go swimming? Nobody likes a soggy cracker!"

"A priest, a horse and a leprechaun walk into a bar. The bartender says, ""What is this, some kind of joke?"""

"A Muslim walks into a bar... Just kidding it's haram"

"Shave legs ?? Bikini wax ?? Lose 10 lbs ?? Pluck eyebrows ?? Mani/pedi ?? Sexy panties ?? Ready for my big *date! *gynecologist"

"I almost choken on food and the whole time it was happening I was just thinking ""What a cliche way for a fat person to die of"""