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Joke of the Day
"What did the executioner say to his wife when he left? I'll beheading out now."
Next Joke
 
"A man is in critical condition for swallowing 250,000 dollars in large bills. No change is expected."
"If the Pope could smell my farts right now he'd cancel Christmas."
"I don't really care who wins the elections as long as everyone had fun out there."
"Kim Kardashian is essentially three asses stacked on top of each other."
"What's the difference between a gay man and a freezer? The freezer doesn't fart when you pull your meat out."
"Are you a can of mountain dew? Cause I'd mountain dew you."
"Why is a guy in the Navy called a seaman? You are what you eat!"
"After being away from Reddit for a day, how do you keep up with what you missed? You go to 9gag."
"A woman at work told me I look younger with my glasses off. I told her she looked younger with my glasses off, too."