195082

Joke of the Day

"Why do women make such horrible capenters? Because for years men have telling them that |----------------| is 8 inches long."

"Have manufacturers of picket fences ever gone on strike? Because the irony would be awesome. Take your time, I'll wait."

"How many Hilary Clinton supporters does it take to change a lightbulb? None- they prefer to be kept in the dark"

"They say travel broadens the mind... Except for Americans, where it just seems to widen the arse (Jimmy Carr)"

"What's the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus? It only takes one nail to hang up a picture of Jesus."

"The programmer's wife tells her husband: ""Run to the store and pick up a loaf of bread. if they have eggs, get a dozen."" The programmer comes home with 12 loaves of bread."

"My uncle went to Ireland on holidays but didn't have time to go to Clare. He really wanted to see Moher"

"How do you sell a chicken to someone who is hard of hearing? HEY! DO YOU WANT TO BUY A CHICKEN!?!?!"

"What's the penalty for bigamy? Two mothers-in-law."

"What did the knob say to the door? I LOCK you a lot! yep, its corny, indeed, but... I'm tryin'! ~Skip"