194817

Joke of the Day

"I liked that new movie about the masseuse. It had a happy ending."

"What does the most interesting man in the world eat for breakfast? Dos Eggies"

"""Doctor, I'm afraid of people yelling letters of the alphabet at me."" THERAPIST: Oh! You are? WHY???"

"Tornadoes and marriage are alike, because they both begin with a lot of sucking and blowing, and in the end you lose your house."

"I'm all for saving the planet, but recycling jokes doesn't help..."

"It was so hot when we went on holiday last year that we had to take turns sitting in each other's shadow."

"Hard to believe it's 2017 I'm still writing ""this is a nightmare fuck everything omg"" on my checks."

"Whatever I was born in like 10 mangers"

"Saw a phone booth. Hopped in. Came out. Didn't become Superman. Now it just looks like I was hiding while that lady was getting mugged."

"I'll never call a radio station because I'm afraid they'll give me tickets to go somewhere and do something."