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Joke of the Day

"Saw a phone booth. Hopped in. Came out. Didn't become Superman. Now it just looks like I was hiding while that lady was getting mugged."

"Why can't Africa have Volkswagen beetles? Because an elephant will screw anything with a trunk in the front. Thanks to a random guy outside of a 7/11."

"Not everyone can brag about getting a handjob from their barber after a haircut... But then again, not everyone cuts their own hair."

"Another Halloween joke. A skeleton walks into a bar... He orders a beer, and a mop."

"You can stop advertising pizza and beer during football. People who watch football know about them."

"What do you call it when Batman skips church Christian Bale"

"I hate people who knock on my door and tell me that I need to be saved or I'm going to burn. Stupid firemen."

"I made you brownies Me - I made you apology brownies. Her - Oh... I don't like chocolate. Me - I know, I'm not that sorry."

"What do you call a midget psychic that just robbed a bank? Small medium at large"

"Sodium Person 1: ""Hey dude do you know what the symbol for Sodium is?"" Person 2: ""Na"" Person 1: ""I'll ask someone else then thanks anyway"""