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Joke of the Day
"There's no recipe in this world that raisins can't ruin."
Next Joke
"What do you call it when someone admits to caring about how they dress? A confashion."
"Mary arrived home from school covered in spots. 'Whatever's the matter ?' asked her mother. 'I don't know' replied Mary 'but the teacher thinks I may have caught decimals.'"
"Why did Mickey Mouse leave Minnie Mouse? She was fuckin' Goofy."
"My mom's late for everything, and it irritates the hell out of me. For example, last week she drove me to an abortion clinic."
"*gets toy out of packaging, earns engineering degree"
"Interrupting Cow's Cousin Moo. Knock knock. Who's there? Time traveling cow."
"""Grapey."" -me after every wine at the wine-tasting"
"I just took a part time job at a vitamin store... for some supplemental income."
"I'm like an onion When I cut myself i cry"