193615

Joke of the Day

"Told this joke when I was three Me: ""Why did the cow cross the road?"" Parent: ""Wh-"" Me: ""Moo!"""

"So what do you think? New hair? No Shoes? No Bag? No Pants? No * 3 days later watching TV OMG u rearranged the living room - Men"

"I have a lips which makes me psecial"

"What's the difference between a boy scout and a Jew? One gets a badge for lighting stuff on fire, while the other gets a badge for being lit on fire."

"If you could choose between having a girlfriend and owning the new playstation what would be your first game?"

"Let me tell you a joke about my dick... Nevermind, it's too long."

"[5 mins after seeing our neighbour's new boat] wife: ""everything's a competition to you"" me: [trying to find the moon on eBay] ""no it's not"""

"Dating websites I was on eharmony last night, why did it ask my height in inches?"

"Why should you never date a vegan girl? She won't swallow."

"Why did the Elton John wax dummy get down voted? Because it was fake and gay."