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Joke of the Day
"Oh, you're a fan of The Chainsmokers? Name 3 chains they've smoked"
Next Joke
"One liner. I have a cold. The stuff that's coming out of my nose could turn turtles into ninjas."
"What does a black policeman says when he looks in the mirror GET DOWN ON THE GROUND"
"Hey something came in the mail today... What? Deez Nutz! Haha Got Em!"
"Her: Wanna ""lex"" tonight? Him: What's that? Her: Lazy sex. Him: What do we do? Her: Lay in bed and send each other Huffington Post articles."
"If Groot played basketball He'd set the record for most tree pointers in a game."
"What do you get when you cross Godzilla, saved by the bell, and crystal meth? Go go power rangers!"
"A coworker just asked me how I stay so thin so I responded ""I don't post pictures of my food online"" and I think she believed me."
"I just found out that people can still read words when they're in parentheses and holy shit do I have a bunch of apologies to write."
"Me: NO! Him: What? I haven't even said anything Me: Oh, you looked like you were about to"