193038

Joke of the Day

"TIL: The guy who invented the toothbrush plays the banjo in his spare time. Anyone else would have called it a teethbrush."

"Did you hear about the guy who chugged 8 cokes? He burped 7-Up"

"How do you make a Welsh person comfortable while playing Scrabble? Remove the vowels in his rack."

"TIFU by taking someone else's Subway order Oops, wrong sub."

"I'm not allowed to use the credit card anymore, last month I bought 43 falcons"

"{batman walking downstairs} ""Hmmm. Looks like Catwoman's left me a present"" [the half-eaten corpse of Birdman lies lifeless on the carpet]"

"Doctors and scientists agree on the benefits of an afternoon nap, yet still my boss thinks he knows better. Ridiculous."

"What do snake charmers do in the rain? Turn on their windshield vipers."

"What about ""BusinessMyspace""? Nah, it's taken. Okay, what about ""LinkedIn""?"

"Forgive me Twitter, for I have sinned. It has been four days since my last tweet. Because, you know... weed and Sudoku."