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Joke of the Day

"How does an elephant climb a tree? He hides in an acorn and waits for a bird to carry him up."

"God doesn't normally poop, but when he does..... Holy shit."

"What happens when a pope dies? Another pops up."

"[tour of zoo] kid: ""i think its a elephant"" me: ""are you giving the tour"" kid: me: ""anyway as i was saying this is the big snake face thing"""

"Fun prank: a chameleon exhibit with no chameleon."

"Her: Where ya been? Me: At the cemetery. Her: Someone dead? Me: Yeah. All of them."

"So a horse walks into a bar...... and the bartender asks ""Why the fuck is there a horse in my bar?"""

"What's going on under there? Nobody has to know but you. - Poncho salesman"

"Vampires aren't on FB because they can't take pictures of themselves in front of a mirror."

"So a blind man walks into a bar... and a chair.... and a table...."