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Joke of the Day

"What Saudi funded event ended in a massive collapse on 9/11? Hillary Clinton's campaign."

"Why was Mark Fuch a terrible mailman? He keeps delivering to the wrong fuching address!"

"Why did the semen cross the road? because I put the wrong sock on this morning... :("

"My daughter is late coming down to breakfast. Her 3 strips of bacon are getting cold. I mean 2 strips. Sorry, 1 strip. She'll have cereal."

"Woke up this morning with a pillow over my face, hearing someone muttering ""...it would be so easy..."""

"He was next in line at Starbucks. Then she cut in front of him. Liam Neeson in TAKEN 3: SKINNY VANILLA MAYHEM."

"How does a ninja shop for groceries? No one knows."

"How do you confuse an ugly person With an orange."

"If 1 in 5 Women get raped Then why don't they just travel in packs of fours?"

"Accidentally ran the wash with Ecstasy still in a back pocket. Now my jeans are freaking out, and the zipper won't stop grinding its teeth."