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Joke of the Day

"How do you make the 12th man Happy? FIRE BEVELL"

"""You know why I pulled you over?"" ""Does anyone know why anyone's pulled over?"" ""Wow. You're free to go."" ""Is anyone free?"" ""Oh you're good."""

"THE SUN HASN'T RISEN IN SIX WEEKS AND THE ANIMALS ARE AGITATED. THE EMERGENCY BROADCAST SYSTEM JUST SAYS ""THAT'S ALL FOLKS"""

"ZOMBIE 1: why do we eat brains? ZOMBIE 2: because. It's food for thought! haha ZOMBIE 1: [sigh]"

"I have an excellent memory... I cant even remember the last time i forgot something."

"""The ankle so important to a basketball player."" Something the announcer just said."

"Girl, are you a homeless horse? Because you look unstable."

"I want to handle the topic of traditional homosexual polygamy Just like my four fathers did"

"My apathy is at an all time whatever."

"Why did the Chicken Cross the Road? Because North Korea's nukes couldn't reach him there"