191996
Joke of the Day
"[filling out job application] Race: Barbarian"
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"I keep waiting for my Cadbury Creme Eggs to hatch into Cadbury Creme Chickens, but no luck so far. And sitting on them certainly didn't help"
"The time between the nurse leaving the room and the doctor entering is for exploring and trying out as many tools as possible"
"What's the different between a knife and a feminist? A knife has a point"
"Teacher: This is the third time I've had to tell you off this week what have you got to say about that? Pupil: Thank heavens it's Friday!"
"Did you hear about the teacher who was always cross eyed? She struggled to control her pupils."
"[out in public] Me: A kid is crying. Wife: It's not one of ours. [we fist bump]"
"Two Arabs walk into a bar"
"A man from out of town walks into a bar... ...the locals know to duck."
"Great joke I heard at a standup show in Houston this weekend. (Dark humor) Give a man a fish, and he you will feed him for the day. Give a man two prosthetic legs, and he'll shoot his girlfriend."