191986

Joke of the Day

"What do you call a frog that jumps half the distance to its destination every time? An asymptoad."

"I'm going to the reverse origami championship tomorrow Can't wait to see how it unfolds"

"How to get a job on Game of Thrones: Q: Can you act? A: Sorta Q: Will you get naked? A: Yes HIRED!"

"What do you get when you cross the New World Order and risque behavior? The Illuminaughty"

"They should make another Taken movie, about Liam Neeson's character being under-appreciated for trying to keep his family safe. ""Taken 4: Granted"""

"Don't judge men by their wealth or appearance, judge them by their characters. All 140 of them."

"Magic Johnson is one positive individual."

"Of course it's you. if it was me I wouldn't even bring it up."

"What's the difference between a Scottish guy and Mick Jagger? One says ""Hey, you, get off of my cloud!"" The other says ""Hey McCloud, get off of my ewe!"""

"People named Thomas, your nickname isn't ""Thom"" it's Tom. ""Thom"" thounds sthupid and prethenthiuos."