191427
Joke of the Day
"Yo momma's so fat ...that the city of Dublin was named after her daily weight gain."
Next Joke
"It concerns me when someone comes out of the bathroom stall and has to wash their hands all the way up to their elbows"
"What is white and hurts a homophobic man if it lands on him? An airplane"
"Billionaire: I'd like to do something about crime. Butler: Being poor, I've got some great ideas-- Billionaire: I want to dress as a bat."
"What does a Mexican have in common with a cue ball? The harder you hit em' the more English you get outta em'!"
"[gazes up at moons] [that's right in this tweet there's several moons] [girl kisses me] [that's right in this tweet I am not human garbage]"
"Only a few of you have figured out that in every tweet I've ever written I've been subtweeting Pitbull."
"My wife asked me to go down to the shop to pick up six cans of sprite... When I got to the checkout I realized I accidentally picked 7-up."
"Top Five Accountant Taboos: 5. Unreconciled difference 4. Doesn't foot & crossfoot 3. No journal entry support 2. Cooking the books 1. Sex"
"I just got an email that Netzero closed my account due to inactivity, I guess that must have taken 12 years to get here."