191148

Joke of the Day

"I asked my Spanish friend if he knew what potassium is... He didn't. All he said was ""Que?"""

"What do you call a narcissistic plant with an erection? A self-raising flower. I'm so sorry."

"Is an inactivist a thing? Because I think I am that."

"Guys, for Valentine's Day leave 3 notes scattered around your house for your girlfriend that say ""Will"", ""you"", and ""me."" That'll keep her busy while you watch sports."

"The 2014 world limbo champion walks into a bar... and loses his title."

"A chemist is surprised by a pan of old-fashioned magnesium photo flash powder going off in front of his face. ""MgO!"" He shouts, temporarily blinded."

"My friend just said this: Never be a half assed dog owner... It'll bite you in the ass every time"

"A Janitor starts up his car. ""Broom broom"""

"A man with Alzheimer's decides he wants tell some friends a joke. WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE"

"Cute Pirate Joke What is a pirate's favorite fast food restaurant? Well, you might think that it'd be Arrrrby's, but they are actually quite fond of Long John Silvers."