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Joke of the Day
"What do you call a Scottish lady that wears nothing but a tie? Hentai."
Next Joke
"If a shark attacks you, DO NOT punch him in the nose. Be the bigger person and just ignore him."
"Actors retweeting compliments is the modern day version of actors murdering hookers."
"Yo. Real shit. Just bcause you went and got your logo printed on some t-shirts, that does NOT mean you have a clothing company. U got shirts"
"What's the best thing to say if a pizzaman does an AMA? OP delivers."
"Feeling stressed out? Make a nice cup of hot tea and then spill it in the lap of whoever's bugging you."
"How many dead hookers does it take to change a lightbulb? Not 6. My basement is still dark."
"Whenever I go for a jog and it's raining, I like to pretend that someone killed my family and I have to get strong and avenge their death."
"What happens when two burgers fall in love? They live together in holy meatrimony!"
"Did you know the pope really loves cats? He's a real catholic."