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Joke of the Day
"What's the most common view of porn? In HD."
Next Joke
 
"After just starting uni, I have decided I don't like referencing. I don't like it et al."
"[blind date] ""I'm like, really good at *looks on hand* making the sex"" -did you just read that off your hand? ""Hey! You're not blind!"""
"Black Betty walked into a butcher shop and asked for beef. The butcher replied, ""No Black Betty, Ham or Lamb?"""
"""It's a banana in my pocket"" ""May I remind the defendant that he's under oath?"" *averts eyes* ""I'm glad to see you"""
"TIFU by hooking up with a girl named Jenny jk fuck Jenny and Zach"
"What happened to the witch with an upside down nose? Every time she sneezed her hat blew off."
"Smiles from ear to ear. Wife: what are you smiling about? Our dog just took a giant dump in our neighbors yard Wife: God I love that dog."
"Q: What country is ill? A: Germany."
"Sometimes I want to get married just so I can have something sad to tweet about."