1904

Joke of the Day

"What does my physics professor have in common with Gandalf? YOU SHALL NOT PASS!!!"

"Did you hear the one about the blonde that had a problem with her bed? She couldn't find a knife large enough to apply the bed spread."

"Girlfriend mentioned she was lacking iron in her diet.nnnI gave her all my wrinkled shirts.nnnAnd that's how the fight started."

"Why do we let women and children off a sinking ship first? So the sharks aren't hungry anymore."

"No one seems to like my gallows humor. They get so hung up about it."

"Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven? It looks like you landed on your face"

"The forecast isn't calling for rain so I'm just going to wash my car to prove the weatherman wrong"

"My girlfriend can manipulate the muscles in her fanny to make a shag feel like a blowjob. Ironically, when she uses the muscles in her mouth, she sounds like a twat."

"My friend decided to get a tattoo of Pi on his face. It was an irrational decision."

"I don't have OCD... I have CDO. The letters are in alphabetical order, as they should be."