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Joke of the Day

"What do you call it when you cover your penis in postage stamps? Junk mail. (Credit to one if my FB friends)"

"I tried to reason with the poop smudge in my toilet bowl. The whole thing was pointless, it just got pissed off anyway."

"Guys, this may all be some sort of marketing ploy, but if the email I just received is accurate then local singles want to fuck."

"Wife just said ""burgs"" instead of ""burgers"" and now I'm a little scared to think of what she's going to do with all the time she saved."

"baby i put the STD in stud now all i need is u"

"I hate it when I'm trying to make money and someone greases the stripper pole."

"This cab driver has zero clue that ive played crazy taxi extensively and am critiquing his every move"

"If they made a movie of my life it would be a lot of me looking for something to wipe my hands on."

"Have you tried Ethiopian Food? Neither have they."

"What did the one banana say to the other banana who had his feelings hurt? I know that peel."