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Joke of the Day

"My wife's cooking is so bad We say our prayers after the food"

"A pedophile, a rapist, and a Catholic priest walk into a bar... He orders a drink."

"She said she was a free spirit. That's good. Wasn't sure how I'd pay for a spirit."

"Why are thousands of kittens dying everyday? For some sick, strange reason, men enjoy smashing pussy."

"What would you get if you crossed Bill Gates with Louis Leakey ... a philanthropologist."

"$2000 date? We better be sitting at the table with Jay-Z and Obama at the same time while eating dinosaurs & sippin' on virgin Indian tears."

"What's the difference between a Pakistani middle school and an Al Qaeda training ground? I dunno, I just fly the drone."

"How man hipsters does it take to change a lightbulb? It's an obscure number, your probably never heard of it."

"What do math and mermaids have in common? They both have an alge-bra."

"My daughter has reached that age where she's asking embarrassing questions about sex Just this morning she said, ""Daddy, is that the best that you can do?"""