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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a man with a blood-covered axe with necklaces made of fingers running towards you? Why the fuck are you still thinking what to call him? Run and get the cops!"

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"What's worse than a talking parrot joke? The Holocaust."
"[First Date] ME: I prepared some questions to get to know you HER: Ok! ME: What's the capital of Honduras? HER: um... ME:[writing] bad at geo-"
"Q: How do you get 27 kids to carve a statue? A: Have everybody chip in."
"People in California be like Tree down walkway closed!"
"What did the monkey say when he was on a winning streak? I've banana roll lately."
"Halal sounds a lot like Arnold swartzenegger greeting someone."
"You're the bomb A Muslim walks into an airport wearing the flashiest clothes, he meets a friend who shouts at him you're the bomb. Everyone sets of sprinting in all directions."
"Is your ass okay? It has a crack in it."
"Why the plus or minus on the pregnancy test, ept? How about a simple yes or no and we'll decide if that's positive or negative."