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Joke of the Day
"Too bad the dinosaurs didn't have a Bruce Willisaurus to fly into space and blow that asteroid up."
Next Joke
"How do you pick up a feminist? Like a bowling ball."
"i'm happy when life hands me lemons. can't do shots of tequila with artichokes."
"Generally speaking, a woman's hotness is directly proportional to the number of times your wife calls her a whore."
"Coming soon to Fox and Friends: a crime fighting duo useless at stopping mass shootings. They are THOUGHTS AND PRAYERS, Wednesdays at 9 pm."
"Hair is like fitness... If you don't condition, it'll suck (I'm sorry for nothing)"
"Which country's currency weighs as much as it's worth? Australia. Because five $0.20 coins are about half a pound."
"main difference between /news/ mods and north korea? one side executes people for no reasons and puts people in detentions camps, the other one is a country."
"Giraffe: That's the most disgusting thing I've ever seen! [5 min later] *vomits*"
"What 'secret ingredient' do you add to your meals in order to improve the taste? I cumin it."