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Joke of the Day
"Your turtle puns tortoise family apart"
Next Joke
"Think about the nicest thing anyone's ever said about you. Not really true, right?"
"How does the man on the moon cut his hair? Eclipse it!"
"yo momma so fat when her name was the answer to a crossword clue, it was 10 spaces down and 10000 spaces WIDE!"
"Someone with a thick Italian accent walks up to a man and says ""I really like europeanness."""
"There are two types of people in the world, those who sweat when eating spicy food and those whose nose drips when eating spicy food."
"hey there delilah, oh shit no i meant vicky babe i promise you're the only one no this is not a hickey ?it's just a bruuuise ?"
"How does Austin Powers decide which guys he will sleep with? (NSFW) By giving them an oral test first. ""If you can gag me, you can shag me!"""
"If someone tweets in the bathroom they are live streaming."
"Do you ever order a club sandwich just to feel like you're a part of something?"