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Joke of the Day

"Do you ever order a club sandwich just to feel like you're a part of something?"

"I went to a fight and a hockey match broke out... http://www.sbnation.com/nhl/2015/11/14/9736852/jets-predators-unsportsmanlike-penalties"

"I like sleeping with amish women that way i don't have to call the next day"

"Ever accidentally say 'I love you' to important business customers on the phone? Me too. I MEAN ME NEITHER."

"From the looks of your eyebrows, your shock collar must have malfunctioned."

"How do you know if someone is Puerto Rican? They tell you."

"One of my friend told me that she got accepted at Dalhousie University... I told her to stay away from the dentistry students"

"Dear Americans: It's called snow. It's cold and wet, but can't hurt you from inside the house. It has no opposable thumbs. #AskCanada"

"Saw a white guy putting daisies in masa. He was trying to make flower tortillas."

"When I see lovers' names carved in a tree, I don't think it's sweet: I just think it's surprising how many people bring a knife on a date."