189807

Joke of the Day

"How many hipsters does it take to change a light bulb? It's an obscure number you've probably never heard of."

"I was wondering why the baseball was getting bigger, and then it hit me."

"The second best ""asm"" is ""sarc."""

"I got a job crushing cans at the supermarket... It was Soda Pressing."

"Today is my birthday, and my lesbian neighbors decided to gift me a Rolex. I don't think they quite understood when I said ""I wanna watch""."

"[Russian class] Um, why did I fail this test? Teacher: You just wrote in English and added ""ski"" to the end of the words... I knowski."

"What disease causes people to swear at the dinner table? Gilles de la gourmette"

"If I had a talking shark for a sidekick, I'd probably get into more deep sea shenanigans."

"You guys want to play that new Michael Brown drinking game? It's easy, you just stand there and take eight shots."

"hey ther delilah wats it like in gotham city is the joker stil in jail-- i mean yes babe u look so prety yes u do batman is not a cool as u"