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Joke of the Day

"VALENTINE'S DAY PLAN: Go to the homes of all couples who Instagram pictures of fancy restaurants and rob them while they're eating dinner."

"A standard elevator can hold 1700 lbs or 5 Tinder matches..."

"Incest Fun for the whole family (probably a repost)"

"Sorry I always spell your name Brain, guys named Brain."

"My Indian friend decided to take off his turban Hats off to him."

"What do you call a pair of sadomasochists who break up as soon as the going gets tough? Fair leather friends"

"Knock Knock. Who's there? *long pause* ding-dong ditch."

"Everyone thinks the same thing when buying Drano. What a waste of money! That's $5 down the drain... ( )"

"I got a tattoo in the bald spot on top of my head that reads ""let go of my ears lady, I know what I'm doing"""

"My doctor says that I'm unstable and that I should get a lobotomy... Fuck him, first thing in the morning I'm gonna march right in there and give him a piece of my mind!"