189418

Joke of the Day

"Why doesn't God like pizza? Because he doesn't exist."

"Why wasn't the vampire working? He was on his coffin break."

"Four more years is a great thing to shout at a president running for reelection... But not so good to shout at a 14 year old girl."

"The length of time toddlers stare at each other on the playground would get you stabbed if you did that shit as an adult."

"Laughter is the best medicine. Unless you have herpes. Laugh all you want. You'll still have herpes."

"My computer's RAM isn't that great... ...but it still has faster processing than the DMV."

"You know what I call it when cute girls cut themselves? Damaged goods, damaging the goods."

"How can you tell the inventor of the toothbrush was from West Virginia? If he was from anywhere else it would be called a teethbrush."

"How do you top a car? with the break tupid!"

"A guy is watching TV and suddenly Yells, ""Don't enter that church you fool!"" His wife asks him, ""What are you watching?"" ""OUR WEDDING!"""