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Joke of the Day

"I am still at a loss over Hillary Clinton's defeat and I emailed my consolations to her, but never got a response Do I need to call FBI to look into it"

"You show me a migraine and I'll show you a real pain in the neck"

"A black man went into a bank and asked for a job. ""You're in luck!"" said the manager. $50 thousand a year, and a car!! ""You're joking!"" said the black man. ""Of course I'm joking. But you started it!!"""

"Why is thanksgiving such a special holiday at the gas station? It is a day to be tankful."

"A hipster just darted in front of me in traffic. I almost didn't see him because he was so ironic."

"Why is pornhub so busy today? Because it's erection day!"

"Son: Dad, I'm gay. Dad: whatever floats your boat son. Son: what floats your boat dad? Dad: Buoyancy."

"I'm sick and tired of scandals always being named ""-gate"" The only thing about it that consoles me is there's a parallel universe where Watergate Hotel was instead named after John Hancock."

"My perfect score friend is allergic to alcohol He can't take anything that is less than 100percent"

"Been reading about instinctive behaviors. Apparently, my natural reaction to seeing an attractive woman is a Fixed Action Pattern (in short, FAP)."