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Joke of the Day

"Why did the girl bring 2 basketballs to the basketball game? Because there was 2 basketball courts. DUH!"

"My mother-in-law said ""just do what you normally do"" when she came to stay with us. Not going to lie, naked Saturday was a little awkward."

"What do you call a person who's happy on a Monday? Unemployed."

"The Baby Boomers decided to leave us with one last present. This Presidential election."

"[remodel] Me: can you please keep that awful noise down? Contractor: for the last time, sir, we don't control who's running for president."

"Do you like apples? How bout I fuck you in the ass, how'd you like them apples!"

"OMG! I just got an email (in my bulk mail folder) from Oprah Winfrey!!! She's gonna help me increase the size of my penis!!!"

"Pirates and the Alphabet How come pirates can't say the alphabet? They always get lost at ""c""."

"What did the Terminator say when he decided to take up piano? I'll be bach."

"Did you hear about the Mexican guy who cheated on his wife? It was really sad and now he only sees his kids on weekends."