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Joke of the Day

"How long does Netflix have to be down before they send someone to your house to stroke your hair & tell you everything's going to be alright"

"so a man comes into a bar........ Oh wait no it was a horse....... So a man comes into a horse.........."

"[solicitor reading my will] ""He [takes off glasses & pinches bridge of nose], He wants to donate his arm to the drummer from Def Leppard""."

"SON: What's a sex tape? ME: Er well when er a man & a woman have er intercourse they S: No M: No? S: Dad. I know what sex is. What's a tape?"

"!HARD Drive! Q: What's the difference between a woman and a computer? A: Woman doesn't accept 3 1/2 inch floppies.[Source](http://smile.xonaki.com/Joke/EN?categoryCode=EN&jokeId=95)"

"I guarantee you Adam & Eve were white. You ever try and take a rib from a black man?"

"If a man says he is going to fix something he will. There is no need for a women to ask every 6 months about it"

"So, I hear Islam is the religion of peace. Piece of you here, piece of you there."

"Hey you! Did you lose your nose? I just found it in my business."

"I can understand leaving a baby unattended-- but your phone!!"