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Joke of the Day
"They say you can't skip leg day Ironically it is because of leg day that you can't skip."
Next Joke
"Good news: Your wit is really mind-blowing Bad news: It's not my mind that I want blown"
"""Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go."" - Me to my children."
"Oh is it really raining outside? Please post a status update for all of us with no windows."
"How do you start a rave in Ethiopia? You staple food to the ceiling."
"""911 what's your emergency?"" MY WIFE IS BEATING MY KIDS! ""Okay. I'll send the police"" *hangs up. OH CRAP I FORGOT TO SAY ""AT MARIOKART"""
"How I got over my procastination ... I will tell you later"
"Kind of cruel how preschool and the Muffin Man teach girls that they might one day find a guy made entirely out of muffins."
"The most popular guy in a fraternity will end up working at a mobile phone kiosk in a mall."
"The female praying mantis devours the male within minutes after mating, while the female human prefers to stretch it out over a lifetime."