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Joke of the Day

"q: What's got four legs, is fuzzy and green, and would kill you if it came out of a tree at you? a: A pool table."

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"*pulls curtain back while wife is in the shower* me: Are we - stop screaming, it's just me- are we out of Cheetos?"
"Why did the Chemist give up a singing career? He could not hit any of the ketones."
"Just so you know, I am not going to be RTing any more racist jokes. Racism is a crime and crimes are for black people."
"I hate father in laws So I only date black girls"
"Why don't Asians make good Knights? Because then there would be a chink in the armor."
"Easter used to be called Wester But they decided to take things in a new direction."
"Q: What's green and has wheels? A: Grass. I was just kidding about the wheels."
"What's the best way to see yesterday's front page ? 9GAG"
"Why aren't eagles allowed to be sick in america? Because that would be illeagle"