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Joke of the Day

"Hey, Baby, you work for the TSA? 'Cause I've got a suspicious package, and I need you to blow it."

"I went for a run but came back home after 5 minutes because I forgot something. I forgot that I'm fat and can't run for more than 5 minutes"

"Everytime I pull a prank on Niagara She falls for it"

"Why did the Dark Ages existed? Because there were 'nights."

"Me: Why are you in such a bad mood? 5-year-old: I haven't had my coffee. Me: You've never had coffee. 5-year-old: Exactly."

"When I'm in the car and a sad song comes on the radio, I stare out the window and act like I'm in a movie."

"My Estonian girlfriend gave me a BJ the other day When she looked up at me and said ""12 months!"""

"How does a hamburger introduce his girlfriend? Meat patty! Thought of you guys!"

"What is your favorite Chuck Norris joke? My Favorite, When Alexander Graham Bell invented the telephone he had three missed calls from Chuck Norris."

"What did the necrophiliac get after his wife died? Mourning wood."