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Joke of the Day

"I made up a new word. Plagiarism."

"Did you guys hear about that weird snapchat knockoff that only lets you send pictures of sausages? It has the wurst ratings."

"Why can a woman never be a good DJ? They will never listen to Logic or Reason."

"How did Michael Jackson pick his nose? From a catalogue. ba dum tss"

"Why can't a T-Rex clap Because it's extinct"

"NOTHING says ""I am batshit, incapable of relationships, bad with money & cannot be trusted"" like colored contact lenses."

"Did you hear about the new movie about the Nazi with a speech impediment? Schindler's Lisp"

"I finally decided on my Halloween costume. I'm going to go as a French pancake chef; that'll really give people the crepes."

"What did one strawberry say to the other? If you weren't so fresh last night we wouldn't be in this jam."

"What do a cue ball and a Mexican have in common? The harder you hit 'em, the more english they pick up."