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Joke of the Day
"Why did the blonde bring a ladder to the party? I told her that drinks were on the house"
Next Joke
"What do you get when you have Windows and Mac OS X dual booting from the same computer? A co-operating system."
"Folks I'm seeing Trainwreck tomorrow night. Then after the GOP debate, I might go to the new Amy Schumer movie! Yeah, I went there"
"I accidentally swallowed a turntable needle. Good thing nothing major happened good thing nothing major happened good thing nothing major happened good thing nothing major happened"
"An Ohio judge ruled gay marriage legal, as long as the person is dead, proving that the slippery slope now includes gay necrophila."
"I just found out that my UPS guy is a monkey... ...and he's driving me bananas!"
"A skeleton walks into a bar and says... ""Barkeeper, I'll have a beer and a mop"""
"What kind of amphibian is hired to take your car away? Toad. Thanks, HammerElectionBeans for the edit."
"Presently poking others but your poke is important to me. Please stay online and your pokes will be returned in the order they were received. Approximate wait time is five minutes."
"Last night last night a girl kept pounding on my hotel room door.....finally i had to let her out..."