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Joke of the Day

"There once was a zoo with only one animal... It was a Shih Tzu"

"*opens new donut shop called ""The Gym""* You're welcome."

"Show him you care by setting his house on fire so he will have to move in with you and never be lonely again."

"Fun Fact: The average 3-year-old boy can stick 11 kernels of corn up his nose before he needs a trip to the ER."

"Jared Fogle will feel a sense of familiarity in jail. Even inside jail, he'll be enjoying fresh meat."

"My biological clock is wheezing."

"*Skrillex' mother puts her ear to his bedroom door* *She hears constant bass drops* *Dad walks up* ""Sounds like he's Wubbing one out.."""

"Good punctuation is the difference between... Helping your friend, jack, off a horse, -or- helping your friend jack off a horse..."

"Pokemon GO servers are like my life right now. Up and down and disappointing anyone who knows what it is."

"Did you hear about the man who burnt down a field full of beans? He really razed some pulses."