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Joke of the Day

"What do Reptiles love to smoke? Mariguana"

"I was dating a radiologist... but it didn't work out: she could see right though me."

"""I'm your biggest fan."" -- That humongous talking fan you bought from that magician"

"The UK is leaving the EU and because of that, Scotland is moving for another Independence Referendum... So the english are going to get away scot free!"

"Her: You spent our entire life savings on dogs Me: They're golden retrievers, Karen. They retrieve gold. I did it for us"

"If Ben Franklin was a Nazi, how would he have discovered electricity? By frying kikes."

"FB lets you write your sex in now, so I have officially become a hat."

"You think you have your anger issues under control until someone starts telling an important story while they're chewing"

"What's Monica Lewinskys favorite time of day Eight o'cock"

"I'm proud of myself- I just finished a jigsaw puzzle and it only took me 6 months! The box said 2-4 years!"