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Joke of the Day

"I wish I had a dollar for every time someone asked me if my hair really was ginger.. Then again I just wish people would talk to me"

"Apples are my second favourite fruit. They're sublime!"

"I just watched a documentary about ships... ...riveting..."

"freddie crougar once impersonated chuck norris and that is the reason why we have nightmares"

"My gf said she is going to leave me because of my obsession with the monkeys... I didn't believe her at first, But then i saw her face and now im a believer."

"Whenever I throw bread at the birds in the river I always miss Because they duck."

"WTF!!!! My son just called me the N-word!! Neglectful"

"My girlfriend isn't talking to me because apparently I ""ruined"" her birthday... ..I'm not sure how that's possible, I didn't even know it was her fucking birthday."

"I want to be a server at a restaurant that serves fish jelly, just so when people order it, I can say ""I don't think you're ready."""

"Jamie Oliver says there's ""nothin worse in the world than an undercooked green bean"" I'll go out on a limb & say he doesn't watch the news."