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Joke of the Day

"the easiest way to get a ghost to stop hauntimg u is to change ur wifi password and act like u hav no idea why he cant conect to it anymore"

"John 10:26 Holy shit I gotta get up for work!"

"You hear what happened to the frog's car? It got toad."

"1st wise man: I brought gold for the baby 2nd wise man: [hiding frankincense behind his back] actually that gold is from both of us"

"70% of our planet is covered in water, the other 30% is covered in idiots"

"Why did the blonde stare at the orange juice box? Because it says ""concentrate"""

"What's big and ugly and drinks out of the wrong side of the glass? A monster trying to get rid of hiccups."

"What travels down an alley and is full of holes? Batman's Parents."

"Can we still see the Grand Canyon from the air or has the government put a giant tarp over it?"

"I should've known it wasn't going to work out between my ex-wife and me. After all, I'm a Libra and she's a bitch."