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Joke of the Day

"New business name slogans Tawnya's Cleaning Service: I'm not willing to clean my own home, but I'll clean the shit outta yours! What do you think?"

"How do you kill a one legged Fox? Make him run across Canada"

"No, they're not called hedge funds because hedgehogs control the global economy. What a silly idea. :) *later to thugs* They know too much."

"There was a contest for the best pun. I submitted ten puns. I hoped that one would win, but... No pun in ten did."

"What do you call a disabled paedophile? A creepy crawler"

"I feel like something is missing from my life and I don't know if it's a person, a puppy, or just a burrito."

"Politicians are a lot like diapers... They should be changed frequently, and for the same reasons. (Benjamin Franklin)"

"My son can go from ""omg...you're impossible I can't wait until I'm 18!"" To ""you're the best mom ever"" in a matter of $100"

"My company issues user id's to its new employees based on the 1st letter of their 1st name and the 1st 3 letters of their last name. I feel sorry for my new coworker Tim Watson."

"If you're wondering at what age you'll stop messing up your life know that it's not 40 and apparently not 50 either."